Tuesday, March 21, 2017

The silent Killer

Today I want to share my heart and soul with you, I have debated on writing this because I didn't want anyone to know what I was dealing with, I was hiding behind the truth... I didn't want to share how I really felt mentally, physically or emotionally.

I kept thinking if you share this and people find out, they will think you are crazy, you will not have any friends if you share what you deal with on a daily basis... besides what do you have to be anxious over.. you have everything you could ever want : a husband who spoils you and loves you unconditionally, a beautiful daughter, a son and a daughter in law to be,  2 amazing parents and inlaws, a job that I truly love, friends, etc, the list could go on and on.

The symptoms can be: 

  • Feelings of panic, fear, and uneasiness.
  • Problems sleeping.
  • Cold or sweaty hands or feet.
  • Shortness of breath.
  • Heart palpitations.
  • Not being able to be still and calm.
  • Dry mouth.
  • Numbness or tingling in the hands or feet.

Deep down I know I have nothing to be anxious over, but it is so hard to make my head believe that, I have been on meds for anxiety for so many years and I had one pill that was working great, then after 7 years it stopped working at all, so they have been trying other ones, while trying the other ones, the anxiety has been super bad, I mean to the point of my legs feeling rubbery, feeling like I could pass out.. it is so scary.. then I over think and really think I am going to die and leave my husband and daughter, this my friends scares me like you wouldn't believe...

Most times I can pull myself out of the attack by finding someone to talk to ( Thank you Melissa, Ashley, Chris and my hubby), something to listen to, something to ground me, read my bible etc, but at 2 am if this happens I do not have the person I can call or text so I have to find something to listen to, I am not a music person at all but sometimes music will help me get thru it.
I also do a lot of writing when I am having a panic attack, it helps calm me down, take my mind off it and put it on something else. 

Overall Anxiety is incredibly scary, it makes you feel like you are out of control, sometimes you can even feel like you are outside of your body and that scares me mostly. 
I feel like I need a break from my thoughts, a long vacation on a warm beach somewhere... 
My anxiety started getting really bad back in February when I left my old job to come to my new job, I am not sure why because I am completely happy here, I would appreciate any advice, thoughts or prayers. 

Monday, March 20, 2017

Friday, March 17, 2017

Friday Date Night Idea

No technology night
This means no phone, ipad, computer etc.

Sit and have a heart to heart together, you can find all kinds of conversation starters on line such as:


and there are thousands more if you just do a basic google search. 

Wednesday, March 15, 2017

A different way to look beautiful

This is a sponsored post. All opinions are mine.

My cousin is currently going thru a horrible time with cancer and now chemo and radiation and she has lost all of her beautiful hair, her hair is something that she was proud of, it always looked just perfect and it took her hours in the morning to get ready, and in the blink of an eye almost it has all disappeared. When I found Divatress i knew I had to share this site with her so that she could pick out a new style for her and these wigs will not break the bank, they are a great price.


When people are going thru cancer, the worry about picking out the right wig should not be an issue as there are so many great options available now, any color or style that you will want can be found on Divatress

Now that being said, you do not have to have an illness to go out and get a wig, a lot of people will get Wigs just so they can have something different whenever they want, there are so many options for your hair, I usually just have the same style over and over but some days I do wish for another look, maybe I should purchase a wig and have a different look when ever I want. Would you ever buy a wig just to have a different non permanent style ( not that hair cuts are ever forever but you know what I mean)

Friday, March 10, 2017

Friday Date Night Idea

Shop at a flea market

You might score on something great since many vendors like to clear out much of their inventory before winter sets in.

Tuesday, March 7, 2017

Maid of Honor

My Best friend has asked me to be her Maid of Honor for June 24th when she marries her love. I thought I would do a post on the duties "required" ( not so much) by the Maid of Honor.  Ashley and I have been friends for a long time and I am honored to be here MOH.

  • My flight is booked ( Check) 
  • dress is ordered ( Check) 
  • now to find shoes
  • nails booked ( Check) 
  • Hair ( pending)  

This is how she asked me, I cried alot. 

The maid/matron of honor is a part worker bee, part emotional lifeboat. Chosen for your energetic, get-the-ball-in-motion qualities, you should also remember that listening to the bride, making her laugh, and offering emotional and logistical support are also part of your honor attendant package. Here's what's expected:
  • Lead the bridesmaid troupe. It's the maid/matron of honor's (MOH) job to direct the other maids through their duties. Make sure everyone gets their bridesmaid dresses, go to dress fittings and find the right jewelry. Also, provide them with the 411 on all pre-wedding parties.
  • Help shop for dresses (the bride's and the bridesmaids'). And the MOH pays for her own entire wedding outfit (including shoes).
  • Offer to help the bride with prewedding tasks, from addressing invites to choosing the wedding colors and nodding enthusiastically when she waxes poetic about the wedding cake.
  • Spread the news about where the bride and groom are registered.
  • Help the bride change for her honeymoon and take charge of her gown after the ceremony. Arrange for storage in a safe place until she returns.
  • Lend an ear. Whether it's about the planning, the marriage, or the registry china patterns, the MOH should assure the bride that she has someone with whom she can share her thoughts. Even if she seems to dwell on the same subjects repeatedly, the MOH keeps listening.
  • Host or co-host a bridal shower for the bride.  I cannot be there to do this :( going to pamper her the morning of the wedding. 
  • Keep a record of all the gifts received at various parties and showers (or delegate a bridesmaid to handle this).
  • Plan the bachelorette party with the bridesmaids. ( she don't want one, instead, we are having a quiet night at home with movies and food) 
  • See to it that all bridesmaids get to the rehearsal; coordinate transportation and lodging, if necessary.
  • Make sure that all bridesmaids get their hair and makeup done, get to the ceremony on time, and have the correct bouquets.
  • Hold the groom's ring during the ceremony. The safest place to put it? On your thumb.
  • Arrange the bride's train and veil before the ceremony begins and just after she arrives at the altar. The MOH might also need to help her bustle the train for easy dancing at the reception.
  • Hold the bride's bouquet while the couple exchanges vows.
  • Sign the marriage license as a witness, along with the best man.
  • Collect any gift envelopes brought to the reception and keep them in a safe place.
  • Make sure the bride takes a moment to eat something -- refresh her drink, get her a plate of food from the buffet table, or instruct the wait staff to keep her entree warm.
  • Toast the couple after the best man. (This is optional, but it is a nice touch.)
  • Troubleshoot emotional crises. In most cases, this will require lots of tissues, hugging, and hair-smoothing. The MOH continues to be a trusted friend, a good listener, and a smart advisor.
  • Keep the bride laughing. For the stressed-out bride, laughter can be as effective as venting.

I cannot wait to watch them become husband and wife :) Love you Ashley. 

Friday, March 3, 2017

Friday Date Night Idea

Visit an ice sculpture festival

Most cities host an ice sculpture event each winter. Some of the artists create incredible work!

oh and Happy Birthday to my Father in Law who I know reads my blog. Love you and have a great day.