Taken at birth

 From the 1940s through the 1960s, young pregnant women entered the front door of a clinic in a small North Georgia town. Sometimes their babies exited out the back, sold to northern couples who were desperate to hold a newborn in their arms. But these weren't adoptions--they were transactions. And one unethical doctor was exploiting other people's tragedies.

Jane Blasio was one of those babies. At six, she learned she was adopted. At fourteen, she first saw her birth certificate, which led her to begin piecing together details of her past. Jane undertook a decades-long personal investigation to not only discover her own origins but identify and reunite other victims of the Hicks Clinic human trafficking scheme. Along the way she became an expert in illicit adoptions, serving as an investigator and telling her story on every major news network.

Taken at Birth is the remarkable account of her tireless quest for truth, justice, and resolution. Perfect for book clubs, as well as those interested in inspirational stories of adoption, human trafficking, and true crime.

What makes a good marriage great?

I know we are all human and no human is perfect and no relationship whether dating or marriage is perfect and that is how God made us, he is the only perfect one.

 But marriage takes work- when I got married I was giving a beautiful cross stitched plague and it says: marriage takes three, God, you and Me and that is so true. 

At first, when we have nothing but each other, we focus intently on the important building blocks of a healthy and successful marriage. But as our relationship continues forward, “stuff” begins to accumulate and begins to distract us from the very essentials of what makes a good marriage.

Suddenly, we worry more about the appraisal value of our home than the value of our relationship. We check the health of our retirement account far more often than the health of our marriage. Or we spend more time taking care of the car in the garage than the other person in our bed.

Things begin to accumulate in our homes and lives and soon demand our money, energy, and precious time. As a result, we have little left over for caring for the very elements of a happy marriage.

1.Love/Commitment.

At its core, love is a decision to be committed to another person. It is far more than a fleeting emotion as portrayed on television, the big screen, and romance novels. Feelings come and go, but a true decision to be committed lasts forever—and that is what defines healthy marriages.

Marriage is a decision to be committed through the ups and the downs, the good and the bad. When things are going well, commitment is easy. But true love is displayed by remaining committed even through the trials of life.

2. Sexual Faithfulness.

Sexual faithfulness in marriage includes more than just our bodies. It also includes our eyes, mind, heart, and soul. When we devote our minds to sexual fantasies about another person, we sacrifice sexual faithfulness to our spouse. When we offer moments of emotional intimacies to another, we sacrifice sexual faithfulness to our spouse.

Guard your sexuality daily and devote it entirely to your spouse. Sexual faithfulness requires self-discipline and an awareness of the consequences. Refuse to put anything in front of your eyes, body, or heart that would compromise your faithfulness.

3. Humility.

We all have weaknesses and relationships always reveal these faults quicker than anything else on earth. An essential building block of a healthy marriage is the ability to admit that you are not perfect, that you will make mistakes, and that you will need forgiveness. Holding an attitude of superiority over your partner will bring about resentment and will prevent your relationship from moving forward.

4. Patience/Forgiveness.

Because no one is perfect (see #3), patience and forgiveness will always be required in a marriage relationship. Successful marriage partners learn to show unending patience and forgiveness to their partner. They humbly admit their own faults and do not expect perfection from their partner. They do not bring up past errors in an effort to hold their partner hostage.

And they do not seek to make amends or get revenge when mistakes occur. If you are holding onto a past hurt from your partner, forgive him or her. It will set your heart and relationship free.

5. Time.

Relationships don’t work without time investment. Never have, never will. Any successful relationship requires intentional, quality time together. And quality time rarely happens when quantity time is absent.The relationship with your spouse should be the most intimate and deep relationship you have. Therefore, it is going to require more time than any other relationship. If possible, set aside time each day for your spouse. And a date-night once in a while wouldn’t hurt either.

6. Honesty and Trust.

Honesty and trust become the foundation for everything in a successful marriage. But unlike most of the other essentials on this list, trust takes time. You can become selfless, committed, or patient in a moment, but trust always takes time. Trust is only built after weeks, months, and years of being who you say you are and doing what you say you’ll do. It takes time, so start now—and if you need to rebuild trust in your relationship, you’ll need to work even harder.

7. Communication.

Healthy marriage partners communicate as much as possible. They certainly discuss kids’ schedules, grocery lists, and utility bills. But they don’t stop there. They also communicate hopes, dreams, fears, and anxieties. They don’t just discuss the changes that are taking place in the kid’s life, they also discuss the changes that are taking place in their own hearts and souls.This essential key cannot be overlooked because honest, forthright communication becomes the foundation for so many other things on this list: commitment, patience, and trust—just to name a few.

8. Selflessness.

Although it will never show up on any survey, more marriages are broken up by selfishness than any other reason. Surveys blame it on finances, lack of commitment, infidelity, or incompatibility, but the root cause for most of these reasons is selfishness. A selfish person is committed only to himself or herself, shows little patience, and never learns how to be a successful spouse. Give your hopes, dreams, and life to your partner. And begin to live life together.This is a simple call to value our marriages, treat them with great care, and invest in them daily.

“Success in marriage does not come merely through finding the right mate, but through being the right mate.” – Barnett R. Brickner

Finally we are mask free!

 

18 months ago, the world as we knew it shut down.  Our government issued an emergency order because of Covid 19. In any public spaces we had to wear masks, schools closed, we had to social distance, business closed, friends were not able to visit, people were working from home, many people lost their jobs, many people lost family members to Covid 19.  We were in my first ever world-wide global Pandemic. 

No travel, no funerals, no weddings- Life felt like it was on hold.  There was hand sanitizer on every corner, stores that were open could only allow a a few people in at once, people would line up outside to enter a store.  Covid cases were on the rise.  The premier and chief medical officer would do daily updates and each day it was more depressing with more and more cases. 

 Churches became virtual, people were very sad and lonely, suicide numbers were increasing as people did not know best how to deal with this pandemic.

 Then about 9 or 10 months in churches could open with a limited number of people and masks were to be worn, stay six feet apart, sit with your family, exit with your family.

My daughter had to graduate from grade 12 with masks and only a few people in attendance, no prom, no last day with classmates. Birthdays were celebrated with just immediate families or drive by where you stood in the yard and wave.

 Now here we are 18 months later and our emergency order ended on July 30- one day after my daughter turns 18.   We are all over joyed to get rid of our masks, we can hang out with friends, we can travel, and we can begin a new normal- Life will never be as it was before this pandemic hit.

 This pandemic was not all bad- my husband started a very successful business, I landed my dream job, we moved into our dream home.  Covid could have taught us so much- it taught us to be thankful for what we have, so many people lost so much in such a short time,  it taught us that community is essential and so is technology, it taught me that family matters- it was just the three of us for several months and we actually had fun together- some marriages did not make it, but I believe ours is better then ever. 

We were taught to honor each other as they were all we had, we could facetime people but no one could come to our homes to hang out and it hurt especially for me who loves to entertain and have friends over.   We have come a long way in medicine, they now have the vaccine and while I am fully vaccinated, I will never tell you that you need to be, we each have a choice and no matter what you choose, I still respect you.  

It taught me to love, to listen, to care, to respect and to help.

Brooke is 18 today

 

18 years old, yet it still feels like

only yesterday that you were a baby

and I was cradling you in my arms. Now when you come into my room when I am laying in bed and snuggle beside me, it makes my heart smile so big.

The love I had for you then was

enormous, but each year since

that feeling of love and adoration

has only grown.

You will always be my sweet little

girl, my darling daughter. Your momma loves you more then any words can ever say, you are the light of my life. 

Happy 18th birthday to you.