Weekend Recap

Friday
- babysat our pastors little 2 year old as her momma fractured he ankle and in a cast for a couple weeks, we had fun but she wore me out completely
- hubby and I went on a date night to swiss chalet
-Brooke was out to the exhibition until midnight ( whoa with a friend from school and her mom), they had a lot of fun


Saturday
- we cleaned, unpacked and went to town to pick up a couple things I needed, hubby and Brooke ate at Mcdonald's, i didn't eat at all, I was pooped so i relaxed while they ate.
- watched some netflix and went to bed early

Sunday
- we had a baby dedication ( Levi Hanscom, sweet baby)
- we had our annual giveaway concert, it was a big turn out and lots of entertainment.

Jen's battle with Epilepsy

Today I want to tell you about my friend Jen and her struggle with epilepsy, Jen is one of my role models and one of the best christians I know, she is all about Jesus and her love for him shines thru her very move, I first "met" Jen when I started blogging and we became online friends, some day I am hoping to meet her and to give her the biggest hug she has ever gotten.  Without further ado here is Jen 

Tell me a little about you and your husband: My husband Ryan & I met in highschool but didn't start dating till 4 years later. Missions is what drew us together as we both took off a year after highschool. I went into YWAM & he did a love missions program similar to that in PA where we both are from. I was drawn to Ryan's heart for The Lord...and of course the fact that he is tall, dark & handsome. We both love traveling & trying different ethnic foods. We also share a love for the beach and having weekly date nights. He just finished getting 2 Master's degrees at Fuller Theological Seminary (MA in Theology & MA in Intercultural Studies). We've been living on campus in Pasadena, CA for the past 20 months after selling our house in PA to fulfill his dream of finishing school. It hasn't been a huge sacrifice as we both love the warm weather and the beauty of CA. We are in a place of great discernment as Ryan looks for a job. I loved being a MRI Technologist for 10 years before unfortunately getting on disability 2 years ago.

How long have you suffered with epilepsy? 11 months into marriage I got diagnosed with Epilepsy after having a grand mal seizure which left me unconscious & was taken to the ER by ambulance. I was in & out of the hospital for lots of testing and then following up with a Neurologist who tried all kinds of seizure drugs that I ended up being allergic to. After seeing the best Drs from coast to coast (literally), I am on 4 seizure drugs that are helping to control the seizures somewhat. I still have mini seizures (Simple partial seizures ) in my sleep every night that disrupt me ever getting into REM sleep. I have to take naps during the day because of being so tired. I also haven't been able to drive for the past 2 years. Epilepsy also affects you mentally because you never know when a seizure may strike. Fear & anxiety are something I battle as well as depression as it has been 8 years of living with Epilepsy.

How has it affected your marriage Epilepsy has affected our marriage. We plan everything around meds, napping & going to bed. It is vital to take my morning, afternoon & evening drugs at the same time every day. I also need to be eating regularly & never skip meals. I used to love having my schedule full as Ryan & I are extroverts & love people. Our lives have had to majorly slow down and at times we joke we feel we are in a nursing home. Traveling which we love is now hard~ especially with the different time differences. We would also love a family but the Drs say it is impossible because my one seizure drugs acts like a contraceptive. I feel guilty at times for this major desire & that I'm holding Ryan back from his love for adventure & going out...even though he always reminds me that we are in this together.

Tell me about your brain surgery? After over 2 years into marriage and trying failing drug after drug, we decided to try brain surgery after lots of prayer. I spent a month at Thomas Jefferson Hospital tied down to a bed with Ryan by my side (work allowed him to take off). They had me hooked up to EEG & video monitoring 24/7. The surgery lasted 6 hours as they took the damaged tissue that was sparking the seizures in my brain out. After having a right frontal lobe resection, which could have resulted in loss of speech/talking, I am a walking talking miracle today! Unfortunately, the surgery only helped for 2 months and then all the seizures returned. I had at least one big seizure a month (Grand Mal seizure) which would include violent convulsions, loss of consciousness, bladder & bowels. I wouldn't remember any of them and at one occasion didn't know who Ryan was. Such a loss of control, pride & super scary.

What are the misconceptions about Epilepsy? A misconception of Epilepsy is that it is just a once and done event. Reality, there are over 20 different kinds of seizures. Every seizure causes some memory loss and is not good for the brain no matter how big or small they are. You literally have to take one day at a time & it's hard to plan for the future.
One thing I wish people would understand about this mystery disease is how much of your life truly is affected by it but there is so much more to me than being labeled as an "Epileptic." I don't want people to be afraid to hang out with me because of having seizures. I want people to look beyond the disability & see a person who loves people & who is a big dreamer.

Do you feel epilepsy has changed your life? I can definitely say Epilepsy has changed my life for the better. I always had compassion but that has even increased to a whole new level. It has laid a strong foundation for our marriage as vows were put to the test so early on. I truly feel we have a deep love that has been tested by fire that no one can take away from us. Ryan would say he has become more selfless as he has had to not only be a spouse but a caretaker. He has served me & taken care of me so well. I truly feel he is the physical hands and feet of Jesus. Considering me above himself and his desires. We have had to depend on God to a whole new level as well. We have seen his faithfulness time & time again which has only made us love him more. He is the only thing that doesn't change when everything rocked our world on Dec 2, 2006. He truly is close to the broken hearted. Even though I'm still having seizures I believe he is working all things out for our good and for his purpose (Rom 8:28).

Thank you so much Jen for sharing with us here today, if you would like to donate to Jen and Ryan as her hospital visits are costly off course- or just send them a Starbucks card which they love yet don't always get to enjoy when your a student- you can send me an email and I will fix ya up with the information.

Wednesdays for Women- Depression Part 3

I have decided to share my depression story 

Part 1

Part 2

this is when i confided in Lola...

so i sat in the car and I cried a lot that day because i knew it was over, thought I would have lost a friend in fact we didn't talk for a long time after that.

This is when i spoke with a beautiful, amazing lady who from that day onward was the most understanding person I have ever met

Enter Lola :)

I don't know why i called her that day, we were hardly friends before that, but the more we talked and I knew she went thru the same thing, she battled depression and anxiety..

If i didn't have Lola, i have no idea what life would be like for me right now, i would call her at 1 am and she would talk about it settled and i could breathe right again.

I went to the START( I dunno what it stood for but it was called this)  clinic and i met with the worst councillor ever, he asked me if I had anything bad happen while growing , well no i had a good child hood and i found i wasn't comfortable to speak up to tell them what has been going on, i made  a request thru my family doctor to see a new one bc I couldn't open up.

then i found a really gem,

Enter Dr Slade

I immediately felt comfortable with her because she had this smile on her face and she cares about patients,she wasn't one who would just push my medication on me, she also taught me how to breathe thru a panic attack, how to keep positive, it really helped, then she started on some medication that I needed to get thru the days that i wasn't going to her clinic.

I felt so much better after meeting her a few times , so good in fact I decided I didn't need my medication anymore and i "thought" I was ok to stop taking it..

Survival Kit- Man Crate Challenge

I was contacted by Man Crates to make my own survival kit, a survival kit does not have to include matches and food... etc.

Men are so hard to buy for, but after checking out this list of cool gifts for men, I can now get him more practical things that I know he will use for years to come

My List first:

1. Coffee

2. Ipad and iphone

3. Coffee Whitner ( Vanilla)

4. Pen and notebook 

Here is hubby's 

1.  Coffee 

2. Laptop

3. A good book 

4. A knife 

Men are so hard to buy for but this website has no limit on what you can buy for that man on your list, Christmas isn't far away so you might want to check it out. 

They are also on Facebook and Twitter  

Middle School

It's that time of year again! You wake up in a sweat, shaken from the dream where your clock doesn't go off and you are late. You know what I'm referring to -- "The First Day of School!" Whether veteran or rookie, we all have mixed feelings of excitement and fear about that day.

Dear Brooke; 

As you embark on a new school, a new grade, a new teacher, new class mates… may you know how incredibly proud I am of you, you are so smart and intelligent.  Grade 6 = Middle School 

As you open that new pencil case, open your new binder, make that first mark on paper with a new pen or pencil, please know that I am thinking about you every day, I whisper a prayer for you as you start each new day.. 

Some things I want to tell you: 

Smile- Smile all day long if you want to; smile when you want to frown, smile before and after a test, smile to the person who isn’t so nice to you 

Make Friends- Make friends with the person who no one else wants to be friends with, make friends with the class bully ( if there is one), make friends with the person that people don’t like. 

Study- Study each day, review everything you learned daily, it will make it easier when exam time comes. 

Take Notes- Lots and lots of notes, you will be thankful when you need to study for a test, the more notes you have the more examples you have. 

Be Kind and Share- Share your lunch with the kid who has none, share your school work ( i don’t mean cheating) with the kid who missed a day, share your pencils with someone who has none. 

Always be true to who you are. Trying to be someone else is like being second-best. The greatest relationships you will ever have will be with those who know, love, and accept you for who you are. You are such a sweet lovable caring stubborn helpful independent joyful human being.

First Impression- make sure it is a good one as you only get one chance to make the first one

Popularity- Please remember that it does not matter how popular you are. What does matter is always treating others with kindness and respect. THAT is what you will want to be remembered by.

Dream big baby girl. Shoot for the stars. Always set goals and work your hardest to achieve them. I’ll always believe in you. I am your biggest fan.

Marriage Tip # 4-

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Week 4 of Marriage Tips 

You can find the previous weeks by clicking on the week
Week 1- Dating/Courting
Week 2- Communication
Week 3- Fall In love, Over and Over
Week 4-  Divorce

Never say the “D Word”. 

 If you’re gonna say it, you better mean it. Plain and simple, threatening divorce is not fighting fair. I did this a lot when we first got married, if we had a argument  it meant our marriage was over and I was asking for the Big D,  I’m not proud of it, but I learned better. I was hurting deeply, and I wanted to hurt back, but it never helped me feel better.

I never did mean it anytime I said it, so one day he had enough and said to quit using it because it is making him think I really want a divorce.. 

12 years later and I fall more and more in love. 

Matthew 19:4-6

"Haven't you read," he replied, "that at the beginning the Creator 'made them male and female,'  and said, 'For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and the two will become one flesh' ?  So they are no longer two, but one. Therefore what God has joined together, let man not separate."