Burn out-2 months in

Two months ago, I fell apart in my doctor's office and with her encouragement I agreed. 

I made one of the hardest decisions I’ve ever had to make—

I stepped back.

I didn’t step back because I wanted to. I stepped back because I had to.

I had been running on empty for too long, pouring from a cup that had been dry for months. What I thought was just being “tired” or “overwhelmed” turned out to be something deeper—burnout. The kind that doesn’t just affect your work, but your heart, your mind, and your soul.

At first, rest didn’t feel like rest. It felt like guilt. Like failure. Like I was letting everyone down. My days felt strange without a long to-do list and the constant buzz of busyness. I didn’t know who I was without the hustle.

But slowly, something began to shift.

I started noticing the quiet things—the way the morning light poured through my window, the sound of my own breathing when I slowed down, the joy of doing something just because it made me smile. I began to realize that my worth was never meant to be measured by how much I accomplish in a day, or what people thought of me by but by the simple truth that I exist.

Some days are still hard. I’m not “fully recovered,” and I’ve stopped chasing the idea of going back to who I was before. Instead, I’m learning to build a gentler, kinder life—one where rest isn’t a reward I earn, but a rhythm I live by.

If you’re in that place of exhaustion, please hear me:

It’s okay to step away. It’s okay to say “not right now.” It’s okay to choose rest over running yourself into the ground.

You are not behind.

You are not weak.

You are simply human—and you are allowed to take the time you need to come back to yourself.

One day, you’ll feel the sun on your face again and realize that while burnout changed you, it also gave you a chance to rebuild into someone even stronger, softer, and more whole. 💛

everything feels borrowed lately everything felt borrowed lately.

the coffee cups weren’t hers, not really.

the couch had moved from one living room to another so many times it didn’t belong to anyone anymore. the walls were white, like every rental before. clean enough, but not home.

she sat at the kitchen table on a thursday.

a breeze came through the cracked window and ruffled the corner of a flyer about school pictures. beside it—an unpaid bill, a banana too brown to save, and a list she couldn’t remember writing.

her daughter was upstairs, door shut.

hubby was on the couch, half-watching sports, half-scrolling his phone.

the house was quiet in that eerie way it gets when the day’s been too long but still not over.

nothing felt settled.

they’d talked about buying. of course they had.

it comes up every few months, usually when the lease renews or someone on facebook posts a new “just got the keys!” photo.

but between her health flare-ups, his work shifts, and the ever-growing grocery bill…

how do you even begin?

they tried looking at calculators—trying to figure out if renting was really “throwing money away” or if buying would just bury them in surprise bills and stress.

she found one guide that helped break it all down—comparing things like upfront costs, monthly budgeting, and even long-term goals like equity and flexibility [source].

it was honest about how the “right” answer depends on what season of life you’re in.

and honestly? she saw both sides.

renting meant breathing room. buying meant roots.

but what good are roots if you’re too anxious to rest?

she wasn’t afraid of commitment—just exhausted by it.

every decision lately felt like it came with a million tiny strings.

mortgage means savings.

savings means cutting back.

cutting back means less for the kiddo’s birthday, fewer takeout nights when she’s too tired to cook, maybe even skipping their weekend drives. the ones that keep them sane.

and what if they bought and still didn’t feel settled?

she used to dream about paint colors, about having a porch swing, about planting tulips in a yard they actually owned…

but lately?

lately, all she wanted was a week without appointments.

without chasing pills and energy and someone else’s expectations.

renting wasn’t ideal. but it let them breathe.

no roof repairs. no lawn drama. no six-figure what-ifs.

still… she noticed the way her daughter hesitated to put posters on the wall.

like maybe she’d have to take them down soon.

and that hurt more than she could say.

even the joy felt temporary.

borrowed.

like it came with a due date.

people don’t talk about this part.

how a home isn’t just a place to sleep—it’s where your identity sits.

where your memories live.

and when that place doesn’t feel fully yours… neither do you.

but here’s what she held onto:

the way her daughter still crawled into bed some mornings, all elbows and blanket.

the way hubby made grilled cheese just the way she liked it—burnt edges and all.

the smell of cinnamon buns in the oven, even if the oven belonged to someone else.

she started noticing that joy didn’t always have to be earned or owned—it could be borrowed.

some days, just seeing someone else smile... hearing a friend talk about good news... it lifted the edge off her own heavy day.

and that’s a real thing—borrowing joy.

she’d read something once that explained it better than she ever could… how sharing in someone else’s good moment could soften your own hard one [source].

so maybe the couch wasn’t hers.

maybe the house wasn’t either.

but the laughter? the tiny, borrowed bits of peace? the inside jokes that made no sense to anyone else?

those were hers.

and for now… that was enough.

The Testament — A Bold Reimagining of the Book of Acts

If you're looking for a fresh, emotionally gripping, and visually striking take on the early church, The Testament is a must-watch. Now streaming exclusively on Angel.com and the Angel App, this animated series is available to all Angel Guild members — and it's already creating powerful conversations among viewers of faith.

Set in an alternate-modern world, The Testament reimagines the explosive events of the Book of Acts in a way that feels eerily relevant to our time. It’s not just biblical history retold — it’s a revolutionary interpretation that fuses ancient truths with contemporary struggles. From the very first episode, the resurrection sparks a wave of radical hope, igniting a movement that shakes a broken world to its core.

The story follows the early followers of Jesus as they risk everything to preach the good news — not in sandals and robes, but in a gritty, modernized world under the thumb of an oppressive Imperium regime. It's a world that mirrors our own: power-hungry institutions, social unrest, and a desperate need for something real. As the Temple leaders scramble to suppress the truth before the Imperium cracks down, secrets begin to surface, loyalties shift, and the stakes rise higher with every scene.

But this isn’t just about thrilling plot twists. #TestamentMIN goes deep, challenging viewers to ask themselves: What does it truly mean to follow Jesus today? What are we willing to risk? Are we prepared to be bold in our faith even when it costs us everything?

The modern setting is a brilliant choice — it strips away the historical distance that often dulls the impact of Scripture. Instead, it brings the apostles and their struggles into our world, making them people we can relate to. You’ll find yourself connecting to their fear, their doubts, and their fire. And in doing so, you may just find your own faith stirred in new ways.

With this live action series, powerful storytelling, and a message that resonates deeply in today’s world, The Testament is more than entertainment — it’s a spiritual wake-up call.

🔗 Watch now at Angel.com or on the Angel App — available to all Angel Guild members.

Whether you’ve read the Book of Acts a hundred times or never opened a Bible, this series will move you. Don’t miss it.

GIVEAWAY: 
Do you enjoy Christian movies? I will pick a winner for $10 Amazon gift card if you leave me a comment. ❤

Disclosure: Many thanks to Angel  and #MomentumInfluencerNetwork for providing a one month Angel Guild membership for  this review. Opinions are 100% my own.