12.21.2016

Guest post Interview

A few weeks ago I was browsing Marriage blogs and I came across Courtney's blog. I couldn't stop reading and I was so encouraged by her that I contacted her and asked her if I could interview her, she kindly agreed, so here ya go My Interview with Courtney.  



1) Tell me a short piece of your story I am Courtney! I am the owner and designer behind Love and Whimsy Paper Company. My background is in Behavioral Health and Family Studies with a love for watercolor and lettering. My husband and I have been together for about five years, married for two. The Lord is the cornerstone of everything that I am - I always say, "I am who I am and do what I do because He is who He is and has done what He Has done."

2) What do you think is the most important quality in a marriage?

Commitment. We live in a time where marriage is viewed more as a contract than a covenant - "I will uphold my end of the bargain as long as you uphold yours!" It's easy to say "I do" when everything is going well and in your favor, but what about those moments when your husband snaps at you in frustration, when your wife isn't the same size anymore, when your spouse loses their job and your mortgage is due, or when you are consumed with your children and feel as though you have nothing left to give? It's those moments you have to choose each other despite how you feel or your circumstance that matters most and will strengthen your marriage.

I love the quote from Fierce Marriage - "Marriage is an ongoing vivid illustration of what it costs to love an imperfect person unconditionally the same way Christ loved us."

Marriage is so beautiful and many wonderful blessings come from it, but there will be days or seasons where it's challenging, and sometimes your commitment to each other is going to be all you have to get you through those times.
3) People say the early years of marriage are the hardest. Do you think so?

I think people say the early years of marriage are the hardest because as newlyweds you are still battling your selfishness and learning what it means to die to yourself in order to lift your spouse up. It takes a time to build in that discipline, but do I believe the early years of marriage are the hardest? I think there are seasons throughout your marriage that will refine you into a better person and spouse that are just as equally challenging, if not more. That is why it's important for married couples - especially those in different seasons - to regularly get together and encourage each other, to share in the joy and trials of marriage, and to seek wisdom when it is needed.


4) Have you ever had such a big problem in your marriage? How did you solve it?

Our biggest hurdle has been understanding and learning how to respond appropriately to our differences. Naturally, we can say or do things that can shut the other down emotionally which cause frustration and hurt feelings. In those moments, we both have to fight our selfishness to get "our way", listen to each other intentionally, and understand with empathy. We aren't always successful in those moments when our emotions are high, but we do strive to teach each other how to say or do things better for next time - because how else are we going to learn? 

5)The secret to a happy marriage is?Forgiveness. You learn early on in the marriage that despite your similarities, you and your spouse are vastly different, and that is bound to cause some heartache. Although it can still feel a little awkward, Michael and I intentionally say "I forgive you," rather than "it's okay" when the other is seeking forgiveness because it not only forces us to check in with our heart but also reconciles the situation by moving forward.

6) The biggest myth about marriage is



"I wasn't happy anymore" is the most often reason I hear couples say they got a divorce. And it breaks my heart that the foundation of a marriage was placed upon something as fickle as happiness - I mean think about it, the state of your marriage is dependent upon the roller coaster we call emotions? That is terrifying!

The foundation of marriage is always God and it's purpose is to bring you closer to Him and reflect His glory to those around you.

7) How do you stay connected to your spouse

Fundamentally, we always speak in terms of "we or us" rather than "me or my" which helps us stay connected and keeps our focus on our togetherness. Quality time - meaning no phones or TV on in the background - is super important to us. We love to just cuddle up and talk about all kinds of things! Even when we are doing separate things, like our hobbies, we stay close to each other so we can keep the lines communication still open.

You can find Courtney's blog here 
You can also check out her online Etsy shop where she has gorgeous paper products.

7 comments

  1. I love her view on marriage! As someone with the same views on marriage I think we need to get this view across more in the media. Without it we won't change that belief about marriage in other newly weds!

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  2. I love the quote she shared. What an incredible and powerful view on marriage.

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  3. The true secret of a marriage (the first secret) is being one with God! :)

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  4. Commitment to God in marriage will keep the marriage intact. I pray that God will help me love my husband through Him. That keeps me focused on the right things.

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  5. I love this interview. A lot of wisdom here. I'm going to share it with my daughter who just got engaged.

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  6. Commitment and forgiveness really are 2 of the most important things a marriage needs!

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  7. Hi there Courtney. I am with you. Commitment is key in a marriage!

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Thanks for the blogging Love

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