6.27.2017

Friendships

Today I am bringing you a topic that is near and dear to my heart and that is Friendships, how to be a friend to the single mom whether it be thru incarceration, death, divorce etc, there is someone hurting and we need to be their friend 



10 ways we can build healthy friendships 

Today I am bringing you a topic that is near and dear to my heart and that is Friendships, how to be a friend to the single mom whether it be thru incarceration, death, divorce etc, there is someone hurting and we need to be their friend 

10 ways we can build healthy friendships 

1) Listen - everyone wants that person who will listen to them, give them your undivided attention and sometimes you do not have to answer with words, eye contact or a hug goes a long way. Never judge them or ask them personal questions, if they want to share they will.  

2)  Avoid constantly trying to fix their problems - you cannot fix everyone's problem. By all means, if a friend asks for advice, give it to him/her, They might want you to proofread an important email before it is sent out. Maybe they are struggling with a relationship. Perhaps life is throwing them a curve ball and they need your support or insight. Don’t wiggle your way into every aspect of your friend’s life, telling them how to be the star of their own show. Give them room to process things and make their own decisions.

3)  Communicate openly and honestly- Honesty is the best policy, ask them what you can do for them, share what you can offer, don't be afraid to tell them what you need.   Share what is necessary, but don’t dominate the conversation. When a problem arises, work through it together.

4) Be the kind of friend you want others to be to you- we all know the verse in the bible do unto others as you would have them do unto you. Give that single mom some time to herself, babysit her kids, if the dad has been incarcerated, she may feel overwhelmed and overworked, show her some love, be the hands and feet of Jesus, give her a break, let her get some extra sleep, let her go for that manicure, or to the hair salon alone. You want friends who are honest, kind, compassionate, fair, not judgmental, authentic, and intelligent.  Be that person first and you’ll be more likely to attract that kind of friend into your life.

5) Make time for your friends- Everyone seems to be fighting a constant battle of not having any "real" friends, friends you can call if your baby gets sick to come no matter the time, or a friend to come over to watch a movie with, a friend who is there for you, we all need them.  Call a friend and a invite them to do something, make time for them.

6) Seek balance in your friendship. Entering a relationship with selfish motives and being a person who takes and takes and takes until the well runs dry, is likely to lead a lonely life. Serve and support your friends. What can you do for them? How can you help? What can you add to their life or their day to make it a little bit better?

7) Celebrate what you have in common -  Most friendships are started because of some common thread – a favorite sport, a love of books, an appreciation of fine wine, an insufferable boss. Like my best friend in all the world, we started working together, and then we discovered we both love tea and it just went from there, now we are inseparable. 

8) Be authentic - Be yourself. Be honest. Avoid putting up a fa├žade. We all test our relationships by throwing something out there about our true nature.
9) Keep your promises. - If you know you can’t deliver something, don’t promise that you will. If you make a promise, do you best to keep it. It is better to say “I don’t think I can make it on Saturday night, but let's get lunch next week,” than saying you will show up, and then accept a different invitation or cancel at the last minute, never just say to them we can reschedule, always plan something for the next time you can. 

10) Respond carefully -Think before you speak – especially if you are angry. Choose your words with care. Speak in Love, speak life into their Lives. 

I also want to share a beautiful group with you and that is Prison fellowship, they are great if you have a loved one incarcerated.

Prison Fellowship seeks to restore those affected by crime and incarceration by introducing prisoners, victims, and their families to a new hope available through Jesus Christ. We accomplish this by training and inspiring churches and communities—inside and outside of prison —to support the restoration of those affected by incarceration. We equip wardens, prison staff, and volunteers, including men and women serving time, to create safer, more rehabilitative prisons that prepare prisoners to return to their communities as good neighbors. We advocate for a criminal justice system that upholds restorative values, so that communities are safer, victims are respected, and those who have caused harm are transformed. Outside prisons, we collaborate with churches, para-church organizations, and local service providers to support families with loved ones behind bars and people affected by crime. 



You can find them here 
https://www.prisonfellowship.org/blog/#

3 comments

  1. We gotta learn to be a friend to ourselves too first!

    ReplyDelete
  2. I always try to be the friend I would want. It changes how you treat your friends. Love this list!

    ReplyDelete
  3. I love this. So important to think about ways that we can best enhance the lives of those around us.

    ReplyDelete

Thanks for the blogging Love

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