7.17.2014

Big fat negative

A Big Fat negative
 
It's no secret that I would love another baby or even two, my husband doesn't want another so any time I get a chance i remind him of this ;)
 
For those who may ask- NO I would never "make" it happen without his consent...i have heard people say just forget a pill, put a hole in the condom, isn't that breaking his trust? He could in turn resent me and the baby.
 
For the past 4 years l have had a IUD, {best birth control ever, no pill to remember, no worrying about condoms etc}.because of my bladder issues, they thought it best if they removed the IUD and see if it would help, it got taken out when I had surgery in April.
 
My first cycle was on time, quick and easy, IUD stops your cycle, so it was my first cycle in 3 1/2 years, it was great.
 
My cycle should have been here on June 25, as of July 7, it still isn't, so I thought maybe it's possible;) hubby wasn't impressed, I went to see my gyno for surgery check up, and birth control, I told her i was late and i'd like a pregnancy test, i peed and gave to her nurse who checked it....
it was a long 7-10 mins waiting for her to tell me if the Grothe family would be growing by 2 feet.....
 
Test came back as NEGATIVE, i could have cried, i really thought I was, had some symptoms etc, my heart felt like it sank, I quickly got over it and realized the big age gap it would have been ( Brooke will be 11 soon ), i'd have a live in sitter, i also realized God has other plans for our family.


It does hurt when I see pregnancy announcements, I'm thrilled for you and wish you the best and healthy babies all around!
I know I'm blessed with a healthy daughter, and our family is complete. People scowl at me when I say we're done, it's their business after all...
What about you? If you ever got a negative, how did you feel?

16 comments

  1. Yes I have gotten negatives and felt a deep ache.

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  2. You are blessed to have a husband you love and a healthy beautiful daughter. Cleeve to them and find the happy

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  3. I have wanted to have another child also. And my son has always asked for a sibling. But his dad never wanted one. My son always says that if he has children he'll never have just one, so that he/she won't feel lonely. It's a sad thing to hear him to say.

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  4. I almost don't want to comment on this post because of MY life, but my husband wanted a baby so badly that...well...I don't even know. Our marriage ended for reasons that I can no longer understand, but, trust me, I KNOW the feeling of despair every month.

    Peeing on a stick for SIX years is misery.

    Still...the peace of knowing that I am infertile is heaven.

    For you, I pray that you get pregnant and never have to know what it feels like to never give birth again when you want it so badly. I had had a child prior to my marriage, but my husband and I had no children with one another. We are too far past it, now, to know...but I think that this is what led to everything else.

    The desire to procreate is PRIMAL. It's that simple. For you and your precious husband...I pray...

    ...a baby.

    Bless you. Thank you for allowing me to comment. <3

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  5. I feel your pain. For me though it's more about being grateful for what we have, every day - I have a Gratitude Diary that I write in every day. Let's focus on what we have, feel blessed and if it's going to happen then it will. have trust and faith. :)

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  6. Im trying to figure out how it can be negative, the test shows 2 lines, one dark and one light looks positive to me

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  7. I am not anywhere near ready to start a family, so I have never gone through this, but I can imagine what it might feel like.

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  8. I can also see two lines on this test. The test line can be very faint if the test is taken in the early weeks of pregnancy. There is definitely a faint line on this test! Hoping all the best for you!

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  9. It's hard, but I remember all my many blessings and realize that life is good. Kim

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  10. That must be so hard!
    -Keep trying!

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  11. Just keep trying, never give up!

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  12. this is a test i got from google, so it isnt mine, i didnt have a test like this, my dr did the test in her office

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  13. I have a 6 year old (and 2 older step sons) and I am done. My family gives me the hardest time! If an accident happened I'd be thrilled, but I have 3 boy in my life and it when 2 are not biological, I get told I only have 1 child and that is so frustrating!

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  14. It is so hard when it is a negative. The pain of wanting more children is hard. I have 5 and want more but God says no.

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  15. Awww yeh had a few negatives but then on the flip side had positives then miscarried .x

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  16. Sorry to hear of your struggle. Wish your family well.

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