7.07.2015

Mother/Daughter Relationship

This is a topic that makes me sad and happy at the same time, confused yet, ok let me explain :) 


We will start with the happy first 
This topic makes me happy because I am a mom to a daughter- Mother’s and Daughters should be friends for 1. the changes that a girl goes thru, she needs a mom or a strong female in her life. 2. Someday {right now you don’t believe that if you are younger} she will be your best friend. 3. She is a role model for you, she will teach you to cook, clean and be a great wife if you go that route. 
I want the relationship I have with Brooke to make her happy all of her life, I want her to come to me if she needs a friend, if she has a question, or just a shopping buddy. 
We have that relationship now, we make sure we tell each other every day that we love each other, I still tuck her in at night even though she is 27 days away from her 12th birthday{ WHAT, how}, of course we have mini arguments because of her age, and the changes in her life, I really work hard to make her understand life and how it isn’t always fair. 



It makes me sad because I barely have a relationship with my mom- which really hurts, we have never been ‘friends’, I do not go to her for advice, it is hard because I want Brooke to see how happy it should be, but she is seeing more and more that we do not have a relationship. 

I could not tell you the last time mom and I both said we love each other , I do know that if something happened to me, Mom would be the first person here, she is giving person and loves to take care of people, it is the actual communication that we are lacking.  I would love for things to get better but I am not sure they will, my mom has two friends in particular that are putting wedges further and further between us, there is no telling her what is happening because she do not see it the same we do, it is so frustrating.. any advice on how to fix this problem and become friends with my mom  



6 comments

  1. Have you ever read the Love Languages book? If not, I would recommend looking into it. It talks about the 5 love languages that people have. Sometimes when our love language doesn't coincide with someone else's it can be difficult to communicate love effectively thereby making the relationship hard. My mom and I have very different love languages. I've had to learn to communicate in hers and she's learned to speak mine. I feel like we have a relationship that's better than ever now because we finally know how to "talk" to one another. Not sure if that's helpful, but that's what came to mind! Good luck and God bless!

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    1. I own the book but never thought of it that way, i will look into that again

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  2. working on healing a dysfunctional relationship with my mom due to childhood abuse

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  3. Hey Terri - 12 is such a hard age. Isn't it? Definitely not little, and certainly not big - but craving more space and freedom. It is clear that you are leading her well and challenges are natural. xo

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    1. It is the hardest yet, I thought age 2 was hard, mind boggling how those early days and sleepless night were really not that hard

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